Circle of influence

How much influence do you have over yourself? On others? On your closest friends and loved ones? On the internet and the world? Perhaps less than you think.
These days, many of us want to increase our influence. Me included. I feel the social media pull to contribute, to create content and express my talents and skills to help others. To be of influence to someone. In working with my Mentor and reading again 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People' by Stephen Covey, I see that it is not important how far of an influence I have. I will never be Bill Gates, or Gary Vaynerchuck or in popular mainstream media, so I need to reflect and rethink. I need to be of positive influence first on myself.
My Mentor reminded the Q&A group I was in recently, to aim to improve 1% per month. In other words, work on yourself. First. This will positively influence those around you. They will grow and be impacted and influence those around them and so the circle of influence grows. This is the circle we can control. Not how many likes and hits we will get. What aspects of ourselves, can we influence therefore?
For one, we can be responsible for our communication. Many of the 7 habits Stephen Covey discusses can be applied to communication. How we talk to ourselves, realising we have some control in our decisions and abilities and of course how we speak to others. Instead of allowing external influences to take full control, we can be responsible.
In our communication with others:

• We can be positive and take responsibility to develop our empathic listening skills.
• We can have an idea about what we want from every conversation we have. Do we want a sale or to inspire or to understand? Are we aiming to argue or to become more mature? By mature, I mean listening to the other persons point of view before expressing our own and incorporating their concerns. A win-win for all.
• We can make small steps everyday to improve. You cannot run a farm by cramming the work into one season. You must pay the price everyday. So too in your communication. Every interaction is an opportunity.
• Can synergies be developed further? Where are the possibilities to extend the relationship? An investment in the emotional bank account of others is never a lost one.

What do you need to continue to develop? How can you 'sharpen the saw' and make sure your communication is clear and nourishing? Come back to where can you make a small bit of difference to others. Is it in the supermarket or at the local shop? Can you phone a friend you haven't spoken to for a while to just have a chat and listen? The small 1% changes we make today, everyday will build up over a month and result in even greater change in the future. So what can you change?